Mikee likes to refer to herself in the third person sometimes.

This online journal is a collection of stories from the classroom, the corporate office and everywhere in between.

Even if it’s a dumb story, telling it changes other people just the slightest little bit, just as living the story changes me. An infinitesimal change. And that infinitesimal change ripples outward –ever forgotten, but the stories will last. And so we all matter –maybe less than a lot, but always more than none.

–An Abundance of Katherines, John Green

It is crucial for her to find Anne through her stories, for Anne is the adult who knows the difference between right and wrong and acts after deciding carefully without letting her soft side take over. Mikee is controlled by her child self who is deeply fascinated with all things bright and beautiful. Her parent self, contemplates her actions and guides her with virtues close to home. And if you don’t know what the metaphor means, think id, ego, superego –concepts from Psychology, a science she seeks to spend her lifetime studying.

She leaves it to your better judgment to decide if her thoughts are worth sharing and if Anne is worth finding.

Today we drove all the way to Carmona to pick up Puppa’s clubs. I was excited to be out but eventually got bored because there were so many stopovers where chatty human and I just stayed in the car. They took me to High Street afterwards so that was good.

I got to walk around, but only after they ate pizza -and not give me any (!!!). I met so many friendly dogs and pet owners! Below are pictures of 2/5 dogs I got to play with: Tiffany the Jack Russel and Bruce the Boston Terrier.

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Pakiramdam ko wala akong karapatang ibahagi ang aking nararamdaman dahil hindi naman talaga tayo magkaibigan. Pero ang bigat. Ang bigat-bigat.

Lalo pa’t alam ko na klase ko ang dapat na destinasyon mo ngayong umaga. Kanina nagtataka ako kung bakit wala pang mensahe mula sa iyo. Kadalasan kasi nagsasabi ka kung hindi ka makakarating sa itinakdang oras. Nakakabigla dahil kahapon lang, nagtatawanan pa tayong dalawa. “Pumunta lang ako dito para kumuha ng pagkain,” biro mo pa. Binati mo pa yung klase ko ng good luck bago ka umalis. Ako naman, walang kamuwang-muwang, nagpaalam sa’yo na para bang may bukas pa. Huli na pala ‘yon.

Noong nakaraang linggo, nakasama kita sa likod ng kotse, sa gitna ng traffic patungong Makati. Akala ko wala tayong mapag-uusapan pero buti na lang interesado ka rin sa Pokemon Go. Naisip ko, ang saya mo sigurong maging kaibigan. Sana lubos pa kitang nakilala. Pero masaya ako na kahit papaano may pagkakataon tayong magkatrabaho kahit magkaiba tayo ng departamento. Ang gaan mo kasing kasama. Walang bahid ng arte o pagmamataas. Konti lang ang mga alaala kong kasama ka, pero lahat ng ito ay magaganda.

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May aabutan pa ba ako?”

Basa ng huling text mo sa akin. Kahit hindi mo na maririnig ang sagot ko, gusto kong malaman mo na sa gitna ng kawalang katiyakan at paghahanap ng katarungan, labis at lubos na pagmamahal ang iyong maaabutan sa iyong huling hantungan.

Hanggang sa muli, Kabarkada.

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I sometimes have “drunken” nights that are devoid of alcohol. I’d like to think this is somewhere between dreaming and waking, where you and I meet, and nothing else matters. 

Perhaps it was wrong to be involved so early: while hurting, and hurling against (or towards) the inevitable. Perhaps it meant growing too comfortable with the idea of the “we” that losing the you and the me would happen eventually, and naturally.

I still do not know how to make sense of what I feel, or what to do, or when. But please know that I am doing my best. And there is nothing I want more than for this to work.

But I am struggling to stay afloat and the waves keep pushing you (me?) farther and further away. 

I do not want to drown.


I went on a date with myself today. Got a mani-pedi at the Nail It nearby and passed by the Katipunan Weekend Market at Estancia Bridgeway to grab cards, stickers and bookmarks from Patricias Patterns and Paintings (the other half of this amazing duo is the multi-talented Trish Lim, my former Kythe-Ateneo orgmate!). I wasn’t planning on getting anything else but I also found the cutest phone case from Cuesee Creations. The material is quite sturdy, the print was nicely, er, printed on and it comes with a ring!!! There were so many other things I wanted to buy like cheap books (!!!), cacti (!!!) and pouches but I had to restrain myself because I have too many of those things already and #moneyproblems. Anyway, I’m happy with my mini shopping spree! I guess it’s not so bad to treat yourself from time to time :)

Kilo took me to watch some of my favorite youtube artists on the evening of my birthday. I was (still am, as I write this actually) absolutely ecstatic that I finally saw them live! Truth be told, this is also the first time I’ve ever been to a concert with foreign stars (mall tours not included) so I was pretty stoked.

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I have a feeling that July (my birthmonth!!!) will bring in good tidings! Today, we had our initial team planning. It was productive albeit having tasks added to my current workload. I’m excited because I think I’m really improving the way I plan things. Mga from 3 nasa 5 na. Charaught. I’m also happy that my boss is giving me bigger responsibilities. Kahit guinea pig lang ang peg, I’m up for the challenge because it means I can add value to the organization in my own little way.

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